Ten Ways I Annoy My Husband (Without Really Trying)

1) I have purchased exactly one plunger, which may or may not be located near the toilet currently overflowing. (We have three toilets, one plunger, a 3:1 ratio, obviously not efficient.)

2) I leave wads of crumpled used tissues on my bedside table. What can I say? I have allergies.

3) At least once a month, eager for an evening snack, he pours cereal in a bowl, opens the fridge and finds . . . no milk. This is highly disappointing to him.

4) I leave shoes out, under the dresser, near the bed, wherever. I can’t be bothered.

5) I insist on doing things My Way (aka The Right Way), things like loading the dishwasher and packing correctly for trips.

6) I turn down corners of the magazines he leaves in the bathroom so I can pick up where I left off.

7) Clutter.

8) I mock his heritage by using an improbably bad Southern accent.

9) I talk to him during “important” portions of shows he’s trying to watch.

10) I don’t get out of bed when the alarm rings. I’m a three-hits-to-the-snooze-button kind of girl.

18 Responses to “Ten Ways I Annoy My Husband (Without Really Trying)”

  1. Ben March 8, 2006 at 3:43 am #

    When I pour a bowl of cereal and find no milk…disappointed would be putting it mildly. Fortunately, I eat cereal rarely and never in the morning…only as a bedtime snack.
    As for the rest of your list, I suppose if I were to make a list, it would look similar so I can’t sympathize too much.

  2. Emily March 8, 2006 at 4:46 am #

    Ahhh….#9 would be on D’s list of petpeeves. He now so kindly yells out “dialogue” during his shows. Ha! Like that works for me, it’s evening, I still haven’t used up all my words for the day!

  3. Yvonne March 8, 2006 at 5:26 am #

    Ah – I’m so # 2,3,4,5,9 and 10!

  4. Anonymous March 8, 2006 at 5:59 am #

    I got your blog from my sisters. I love how you write!! I am glad to hear that I am not the only one that has problems with toilet plunger problems!! After my husband yelling for 7 years I have finally equipped both bathrooms with all supplies to help in a emergency!!

  5. Elizabeth March 8, 2006 at 7:34 am #

    #8 – The Lord is not pleased either.

  6. yorkist rose March 8, 2006 at 8:20 am #

    My list would be much longer.

  7. Anonymous March 8, 2006 at 8:43 am #

    New reader here with a Total light bulb moment here, it never ever occured to me you could BUY more than one plunger for a house!!!! I admit to #’s 2, 3, and 10. (age 44, 3 kids – 19 yrs, 15 yrs and 2 yrs) I will SO be back, you rock.

  8. shannon from rocks in my dryer March 8, 2006 at 11:11 am #

    Mel, you are my long-lost sister, I think. EVERY one of those things could be on my list, except the mock southern accent. I annoy my Hubs with my REAL southern accent.

  9. Paige March 8, 2006 at 12:23 pm #

    So what you are saying is that you are a normal wife! Yes; way to go!

  10. dinodoc March 8, 2006 at 12:25 pm #

    I have to admit, #9 would be a deal breaker.

  11. Lei March 8, 2006 at 2:48 pm #

    Lol, wow my husband must REALLY be annoyed with me, then!

    Oh well ;)

    Fun blog!

  12. meredith March 8, 2006 at 3:07 pm #

    I am guilty of #1,2,4,5,7,8(not the same accent) 9 & 10. and countless other annoying things I do

  13. Lauren March 8, 2006 at 7:48 pm #

    Based on your list, I can assure you that you would also annoy my husband… how do I know this you ask? Because change the southern accent to Romanian and I’m already annoying him in all those ways for you. :)

  14. Chris March 8, 2006 at 8:16 pm #

    My wife once vaccuumed during the Packers-Vikings game. The next day I retaliated by relating a very long, boring story, complete with sound effects, during American Idol (or whatever it is she was watching). We get along well.

    Good list, fun blog!

  15. Shalee March 9, 2006 at 8:04 am #

    Okay, you would annoy me too…

    But I have to admit that I am just like you in 1,6,7. 10 would get you a whap on the arm to get out of bed (see 5). So maybe we are really kindred spirits after all.

  16. Amy March 9, 2006 at 6:20 pm #

    No milk and the snooze button!!! Oh my, that is me!!!! I thought I was the only one! I don’t feel so alone now. :)

  17. schauna May 18, 2008 at 7:46 pm #

    I annoy my husband by snoring. I’m a beautician and sometime I work long hours. I commute one hour to work everyday so when it’s time to rest, I rest! I’ve tried the strips accross my nose but that does not help. So he’s driven to trample downstairs, in the middle of the night, to the garage for his helpful ear plugs. Amazingly, the only person that’s not bothered by it is me.

  18. Sharon June 7, 2008 at 3:00 pm #

    Oh my God!!! I do everything you just listed to my husband!!! HAHAHA!! he actually thought I was the one that typed it out cause of the whole mock his southern accent thing, lol. You’re AWESOME!!!

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